Posted

Mar 18th 2005

Mood

Dejected

Music

Sound of Silence

.... i really miss my mate, Riku.... He's been gone for avor 4 weeks now.... a whole month without a word really..... I understand that he's going through alot right now... and that he's been sick and busy with work and all of that.... yet... I somehow think that he's really mad at me...

Like today.. i found out that he faved the pic i drew him.. and yet... left no comment... I was happy to see that he'd been on... but... crushed that he didn't say a word to me...

Maybe it's my fault... maybe I don't reach out enough.... yet... i want him to feel like he has his space, and thati won't freak out if we don't talk for awhile... I'm not possesive in the least.. not like that anyway.... but a month starts to worry me... I've been so scared...

I called him... and... couldn't get through, for whatever reason... but I haven't heard back... and I feel so ashamed for whatever i may have done to hurt or offend him....

By the gods above Riku.... I love you so much that it hurts to have the rift between us.... i want you back in my embrace... if only for a moment... please don't leave me out in the cold.... please call me back.. contact me somehow.. i beg of you.... on my kness I beg it of you my one and only god....

... I'm leaving for NYC on Sunday morning... so I'll be on the East coat... I hopr that i can get ahold of you there....

take care Riku... and know that my thoughts are constantly with you....

All my love...

~ Your Fallen Angel