Posted

May 20th 2009

Mood

Blank

Music

Gekokujo - Kagamine Len / Rin

I think it's easier to write here than on DA. Since I happen to be lesser known here and get less comments.
That's not to say that I'm popular on DA-- I'm not. There's just a few people here and there that comment often. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate almost all the feedback I get, but lately I've been feeling very detached and down on myself as it is. There are times when even logic fails to justify my feelings of considerable rage at people who are only trying to help me out.

I don't post many journals on DA. Not because I don't write, but simply because I never have the courage to hit the submit button. Usually I'd write a very long journal and then delete it because it's childish and irrelevant to my watchers. I really don't get why I do that. My journals are mine and I should be able to express my thoughts freely.

I suppose I care too much about what others think.

The irony in my posting here is that this rant is somewhat about the maturity level of SA itself. I'm not very active here-- Almost all my new work is posted on DA first, then posted on SA if and when I feel like being an attention whore. This is also something of my dumping grounds for even shittier art than usual-- Not that I've been drawing much doodles lately.

But yes, back to my original thoughts. Sometimes I stick around and browse SA a little to get a feel of the community beyond when people look at my own work. But the journals I've read on the first page... Are all very immature. It's very different to read journals here than to read journals on DA. I might say that it's because the people I watch on DA are all very mature and older in age, but I can't say because I don't know the ages of the journal authors here.

I also find that a lot of the butthurt complaining is from artists who are slightly... lacking. In experience/skill, maturity, and I guess general confidence.

I probably give the impression of having very low self esteem because I am very critical of my own art. But I do have confidence in my abilities to improve and advance forward. It's not a bad thing to have high expectations of one self and to be modest, but it's another thing entirely to whine and rage at others for one's own disabilities.

I read a quote once that was along the lines of "The only good artists are artists too stubborn to give up.", and I really like this quote because it's very true.

The things I read on SA make me question why I'm even contributing to this site.

Yes, DA has a bad reputation in certain cases, but they are very big and many aspects of the site, including the maturity and insight of some of the fellow users very strongly compel me to stay. They are not whining about popularity or complaining about things that shouldn't be complained about. They are not bashing or forcing others/their own opinions on other people. The journals there are very insightful of the author's intimate feelings of a subject and allow the reader to be persuaded by their own logic. Above all, I don't ever read any journal that complain about... their watchers.

I guess that line pretty much spills which journal it was on here that set me off.

--~ I suppose in an attempt to stay neutral. I'm sure DA has more bad journals than SA, except that those are almost never made public onto the front page because the site is very big.

Still, I kind of think SA seems to be even more focused on popularity, who-has-more-watchers-than-who, and a higher amount of trolls than anywhere else I frequent.

But~ none of it really matters to me in the long run.

Have a good day. You must have been really bored to read through all this. ):