Posted

Aug 23rd 2008

Mood

Lousy

Music

Beauty and the Beast - Broadway OST : If I Can't Love Her

Oh, in case you didn't notice..

I canceled DiVA. Again.

~headdesk~

The first time I ended it, I had glorious plans of reviving it.

The second time I ended it, it was because relationships reflected in the comic totally changed in the real world.

So why end it now?

Here's a better question - why continue it?

While I love DiVA in the sense that it's my first comic, my baby, etc... it's time to move the fuck on with my life.

The main character is supposed to be me - named after me, can sing like me, etc. But she's not me. She is simply not me. She has very vague traces of my personality, but even then there are so many things about her that are so unreal. She's way prettier than me, she's successful, she's daring. I mean jeezus, the personality trait she and I have most in common is our laziness.

And hell - like 50% of her character design was made up by someone who wanted to make a character based off of me. She's not even really mine.

And even if you take into account that this is a story about anthropomorphic animals in a pseudo-fantasy setting...

She isn't me. Keep that in the back of your mind while I go into this next subject.

Friends that are in the comic. One just about dropped off the face of the planet, another just doesn't talk to me, yet another I can't decide if I even like anymore or not, and a would-be boyfriend that randomly stopped talking to me for a year.

The only characters worth keeping are the "NPCs" and like two of my friends. I've thought about bringing in other friends, but won't that just perpetuate the embarrassment like DiVA the first?

And then there are the constant worries when it comes to my friends. Did I interpret them well? Have I unknowingly exposed some sort of flaw that they wouldn't want people to know? Have I been too worried about embarrassing them to even make their characters...them? Even now, I can't answer that because I'm not them.

It's easier with Prismatic Star- because even though alot of my characters are loosely based on people I've known in my life, it's a very loose association which allows me to mold the character any way I so please without - I dunno - offending someone.

Did you remember to keep that thought of DiVA =/= me in the back of your mind while I went over all that? Do you see corellation here?

Not happy with the main character, not happy with the supportive characters.

And goddammit I hate so many things about the music industry, yet I have a pop singer for a main character. What. WHY. It's supposed to be a huge part of the story's premise but goddammit I hate the idea of having to write and draw music industry crap.

And I hate the word DiVA. Not just because of its stupid shift-lowercase-CAPSLOCK crap (why did I do that anyway?!)...but...the meaning of the word is different now than it was when I decided to call my story that. When I named the comic and character 'DiVA', my thoughts were - "confident singer". Now it seems to mean "demanding bitch". I kept the name during its reincarnations because...I had no better ideas. Just like the rest of the damn comic.

The current definition of diva suits it well. Demanding bitch. No matter how I try to let it go, it keeps demanding I bring it back. Not this time though! This time it's gone for good. And no amount of nostalgia will bring it back.

That said, I've been cutting back on my site - alot.

Star-Vox.Net expired and I decided not to bring it back - mostly because it's just easier to use a subdomain on star-road.net. Now, the idea of star-vox was originally supposed to be my vocal stuff and included a podcast I used to do with a friend of mine. Podcast died, friend stopped talking to me - there was very little point in having it anymore. Kept it initially to post videos and stuff too - but even then a full domain seems unnecessary. So yeah. All that stuff will be moved to http://media.star-road.net ...whenever I get around to it. As a tribute, I'll have Christi the Cat (NOT DiVA anymore!) be that site's mascot. It seems suitable yes?

Also deleted the fan works page because no one actually sends me artwork anymore. o.o You wanna see my fan art just do a dA search. ...hey look, more retarded case changes!

Despite the rumors that totally don't exist, I'm not giving up on the Caps and Crowns "animation". Though, being ridiculously inexperienced with animation - I've decided to cut back on the workload for that. It's going to be an animatic/storyboard with voices and music. I'll have one or two parts that are actual animation - it'll all be very experimental.

As for my voice actors, I'm sure most of you have forgotten about this whole thing by now, haha! If anyone needs to cancel your participation, let me know. Also - I have a few roles left if anyone wants to join up.

I'm making a few changes to the script but it should be done within the next month or so (I'd say "within the next week", but everytime I say those four words it ends up being half a year ).


tl;dr - DiVA's cancelled, new multimedia site coming soon, caps and crowns animation's still on but cut back to animatic/storyboard style.