Posted

Apr 1st 2007

Mood

Anxious

You know, people are starting to get suspicious so I might as well come clean instead of being caught with my pants down. D: You see, I've always been angsting over the dilemma over what I want to do with my art, porn gets me a lot of attention from the community and I like feeling popular, but on the other hand, the style of realism has always got me interested, this was something that had plagued me for a long time. Thanks to my artistic ADD, which not only spans across subject, but styles, I had been given the idea to create a new personality not only to break free from that dilemma, but also to make a start with music composition, something which I've always wanted to try. This has been a creative endeavour years in the making, back in late 2002, when I entered the creative arena as Juan-Miguel. I even went through the trouble of creating a convincing backstory and a long-lasting proxy from Hong Kong. ( I changed it to Joan-Michele, using the MtF tranny alibi, because I'm not comfortable playing a dude, and I don't even know how. ) People had bought it because I was careful to stay in the Sonic fandom with this name away from my usual hangouts, and from that, I had developed a personality which was fun to build up and play as. However, recently, I thought it was safe to move Joan's persona back to the fur fandom and people bought it for a while. But over the course of the months, people began questioning the similarities in our mannerisms, how we like to argue and debate at lengths about our beliefs and convictions, the dramawhoring, how we both like lame jokes and chan memes and how we don't take ourselves seriously enough.

So yes, what I want to really say is, that Sian and Joan are the same person, and that person is me. I'm sorry to have fooled you, my dear friends, for so long. I guess this now could explain a few things, including the dramabomb that happened a few days back as well as how our art styles are somewhat similar, yet different.

Now that the cat is out of the bag, so to speak, I feel relieved. I'll still feel sad if you dewatch me as a result of this, but I guess I can't blame you. I've really enjoyed the company we've had and for that, i thank you.

- Sian