Reminisce -- Chapter One

Reminisce -- Chapter One

"You're too cute!" He squealed, holding the small child above his head and watching as he flailed about, smiling down at the man who held him. It wasn't difficult to say that this wasn't his child. Of course not. He couldn't have one. Especially since he wasn't human...just an animated doll, technically. But no matter what he was, the fact still remained that he had a heart, and a wonderful attachment to cats. For now, he didn't care. As long as the child smiled, held the genes of the man he loved, and stayed with him, that would be all that mattered. He had nothing...nothing at all now. Just the child that was left behind, the life that had to take one to be formed. The handsome child in his hands.

"Kitten...I need a name for you." Violet eyes followed the baby in his hands as he brought him down to his eye level, peering into those depths with an almost loving gaze. It was uncharacteristic for those born in the manner he had been to be anything but cold, cruel, and focused on his own goal. He no longer had goals; there was nothing else to work for. No longer did he have his lover to protect, the handsome young man that he had protected for seven years. No, he had this child...this handsome child that looked remarkably like the one he had lost, he thought as the young child reaching for the stray lock of hair that stuck out from his head.

The child blinked wrapping stubby little fingers around it and tugging with the small amount of strength in his tiny body, giggling at the man as he stared up at it. He found it so entertaining, and he wasn't three months old yet. A soft chuckle left the grown one, closing his eyes as he pulled the child to his chest, holding him close, almost as if he was looking for reassurance from the child that everything was all right. Maes...that was what Kitten had called him. No matter that he wasn't the man from his past. No, he was the reborn form of the man who died, but that didn't matter. His Kitten didn't care. His Kitten...

The child gurgled, playing with the lock of hair until he yawned. Maes sighed, almost sadly as he peered at the small life that he held so dearly to him. He could not let this go. This was the last thing his Kitten had left him. The last thing that gave him happiness. "You may not be my child, but you're all I have left. I won't let you go." The uncanny resemblance...Maes would never allow this baby out of his sight. He'd watch him grow watch him have a family, and he would protect him for as long as he lived.

"You look just like him. And you were his son, so a name like his would be fitting. A cute, but strong name." He stood there for quite some time, hearing the yawns from the little child he held so dear. He was so cute. He was his Kitten...there was no way in denying it, whether he wanted to or not. He couldn't have children, and he didn't think Kitten could have either, but that just proved that humans were cruel enough to put someone who had suffered so much through even more. "Roy was so proud of you...he smiled when I got to hold you, said I would be a good dad. Course, he had to be the mom. But...you won't know that now..."

Reminiscing back on the day always did hit a nerve with him, making him angry, or sad, or...there were so many emotions jumbled into his head, homunculus or not, Maes would never be able to rid himself of them. And...no matter how much it bothered him, he wouldn't get rid of them. It meant that Roy had left such an impact on his life, an impact that had changed the cold, failed transmutation into a loving man who cared for his Kitten and didn't give a damn about anyone else. Their first meeting...the day he died...their escape. Memories could only flood his mind whenever he stared at the baby.

Maes had promised Roy that he couldn't live without him. If Roy were to die, Maes would go and purposely find a skilled alchemist to kill him. A world without Roy was like a human living without the sun. There was no point in its existence. No reason to go on. And the more he found himself watching the one thing Roy left behind, the more he debated on killing the damn thing. How could Roy leave it behind?! How could Roy expect him to care for something that looked remarkably like him? How could Roy expect him to live on without him...?

I wanted to give you something to live for...

Those words...were some of the last words uttered by Roy. After the final round of experimentation on him, he was hardly human anymore. There was no more Roy in the end. At least, not until his final moments, when those obsidian eyes lit up at the sounds of the crying, seeing the shocked expression of Maes, though he seemed rather proud and pleased...when it was time to say goodbye.

"I know! Royce!" He grinned widely at the baby, pulling him away from him and watching his face for any signs towards the idea that he liked it or preferred something else. Almost three months and the child had no name. Maes couldn't bear to give him one, what with the looming desire to kill him, and the thought of betraying his word to Roy following his death...but he realized that Roy wanted this. Even if it did kill him...Roy wanted Maes to be happy. Or...as happy as a homunculus could be.

The baby yawned again; smacking his lips silently, expressive midnight blue eyes watching Maes. He didn't fuss, and he seemed a bit tired, but he did grin at the name before yawning again and reached out to cling to him. He desired warmth, a nice place to rest his head, a place to sleep. And%u2026Maes had been the chosen spot. Before he could even say anything next, Royce's mouth opened again, whining and fidgeting. He didn't like being held out like that when he was tired apparently. Maes gave a small grin, pulling the child to his chest. "Roy didn't like that either..."

~*~

Auburn eyes glanced up at the black door, the brass knocker that of a gargoyle. It never surprised her to see it, to some of the other things that had accumulated in the yard as decorations, or inside the home that had once belonged to her commander%u2026the men behind her had also grown used to the strange way the place had become decorated. It was hardly something that they would worry themselves over. They had a job to do here. Even Edward Elric and his brother (in the flesh), Aruphonse Elric were there.

%u201CGo on in.%u201D Maes said, tossing aside a few branches as he came up towards the front. He had been out back trimming the bushes, seemingly, and was rather bored. In a one arm grasp, he held Royce to his chest, the baby%u2019s small fists curled around the man%u2019s shirt, nuzzling the warm body beneath him, a barely audible purr coming from the tiny body. His black, disheveled locks signaling he had just been woken from a nap, and found that he was much more interested in sucking on the homunculus%u2019 shirt, rather than checking out their visitors.

%u201CHow ya doin%u2019, Chief?%u201D The tall blonde asked, tossing down the cigarette and stomping it out at a warning glare from Hughes. Blue eyes looked from the dark haired child to his %u2018father%u2019, offering an apologetic grin. Havoc knew that it was a stupid thing to smoke around Hughes. One, he loved to steal his cigarettes and torture him, he couldn%u2019t recall how many times he had done it when Roy was alive, and two, he hated Havoc smoking around Roy period, so there was no way he was getting away with smoking around their son.

The woman cleared her throat, blonde locks falling past her shoulders. Riza Hawkeye had abandoned the thought of looking professional. The last time she had come straight from work and looked like her work self, Royce had broken out into screams at the mere sight of her, let alone when she had picked him up. Needless to say, she had learned that he wasn%u2019t ready to see Hawkeye from work, just yet.

%u201CHe%u2019s so cute.%u201D Fuery commented, getting a rather eager nod from Aru as well, the two males staring at Maes, the baby nuzzling into his frame. It was easy to tell who his %u2018mother%u2019 in certain ways was, he had adapted quite a few of Roy%u2019s traits from the trouble the Taisa went through seven years ago. Adorable little ears that twitched upon his head, a small, thin, bony tail that curled itself around Maes%u2019 wrist, the one being underneath his bottom to support him. His round face was only accented by the six, almost invisible whiskers, three on each cheek. And, on occasions, those who changed him, noticed the feet and legs, up to about his belly button, covered in fur, feet shaped like little paws. No matter how deformed he was, he was still Roy%u2019s little one. And that just made Aru more attached to the child anyway.

Royce yawned, his head flopping slightly as he turned to look at those who had gathered on the porch, catching handsome honey eyes first before recoiling and clinging back to Maes, returning to the gentle suckling on his shirt, searching for the nub that he believed would provide him milk.

The homunculus gave a small grin, nodding to them. %u201CGo on inside. He%u2019s getting hungry. I have a few more of Kitten%u2019s things to get ready.%u201D

~*~

Aru grinned down at the little one laying in his basinet, the younger Elric supposed to be changing him but found himself playing with Royce%u2019s little cat-like feet, the baby%u2019s big eyes watching him with interest, wide with curiosity, darting around to see everything that was going on. He wanted to know everything, and Aru seemed to be the most interesting thing, how he almost /squealed/ when he removed the diaper to change him.

However, it wasn%u2019t long before Ed came up, nudging Aru. %u201CDon%u2019t do that, you%u2019ll scare him. Maybe even hurt him. Hughes will kill you if you do either one.%u201D

%u201CAw, but Ed! He%u2019s like a baby kitty!%u201D

Ed raised a brow, grinning slightly at his brother%u2019s enthusiasm. %u201CMustang was too.%u201D

%u201CTrue, but he also had alchemy.%u201D Aru answered, making him kick his feet. %u201CHe%u2019s just too cute. Two of my favorite things, combined into one. Babies and cats.%u201D

Ed sighed. %u201CChange him so he can eat. He%u2019s about to eat his hand.%u201D

Aru blinked, hazel eyes watching as Royce began trying to fit his tiny hand in his even smaller mouth. Aru couldn%u2019t help but give a giggle at it, scooping the child into his arms and forgetting about his changing at the moment. He just couldn%u2019t believe he was so adorable.

%u201CDid you ever find out why he looks like that, Chief?%u201D Havoc asked, lifting up a photo album, a leather bound album with a large photo of Roy, Maes and Royce in what was probably the hospital before Roy%u2019s life slipped away.

Maes turned a glare on Havoc, the blonde immediately regretting asking. %u201CIs there something wrong with the way he looks?%u201D He demanded, hand that had gripped the marble mantle coming dangerously close to ripping it up.

Havoc waved his hands to protest such an idea. %u201CNo, of course not!%u201D He could have so used a cigarette then, but they weren%u2019t even allowed weapons inside Hughes%u2019 home. He knew that Maes had always loved to kill anyone who had made Roy%u2019s life hell; his son wouldn%u2019t be any different. %u201CI was just wondering if you knew is all.%u201D

Maes glanced at the photo that had remained upon the mantle. %u201CRoy was a chimera, remember? That meant his genetic material had been combined with the cat they used, leaving him passing on those traits. I don%u2019t care, really. I don%u2019t understand it. But that just proves he%u2019s my Kitten%u2019s offspring.%u201D

Fuery held out a cup of tea for Maes, offering him a small smile, albeit a bit frightened. Maes was intimidating, especially after all the hell they had put him through, trying to break the Flame and his partner up%u2026but now, Maes needed help taking care of Royce, and the little creature being the blood of the Taisa, had been the reason that Hawkeye and the others were here. Aru had dragged Ed along on his visit to see his favorite baby.

Roy, dead or alive, was their commander. They%u2019d remain faithful to him. This baby was his, and Maes knew /nothing/, as a homunculus, on how to take care of himself, let alone a child. That didn%u2019t mean that they couldn%u2019t do what they wanted, and seal Maes, as Hawkeye had been planning from the start, with Havoc%u2019s suggestion. She was the only one who would have the guts to take on Maes, along with Edward Elric who would do the alchemy part of it. For now, they would be patient%u2026they had to be.

%u201CAUGH! Aru put it back!%u201D

%u201CNii-san! Don%u2019t scream! You%u2019ll scare him!%u201D

%u201CDid you SEE what it DID?!%u201D

Maes raised a brow, all of the occupants in the room turning to the brothers rather confused. What the hell was the commotion? But Maes was the first to start laughing, followed by the other men in the room, and Aru did his best to repress his giggles, though%u2026it wasn%u2019t working much, much to the annoyance of one Edward Elric. Hawkeye seemed to be the only one who could remain calm, and it wasn%u2019t that much better than the others, considering she was grinning as she took Royce from Ed, handing him a cloth. She coughed lightly, laying the baby back inside his basinet and proceeding to put on a fresh diaper. %u201CA word of advice, Edward. Always hold a baby when they%u2019re /wearing/ a diaper. And%u2026you should have waited until I fed him as well.%u201D

Ed glowered, wiping his face and staring down at the once white shirt, now tinged yellow because of the little one%u2019s urgency to relieve himself. How the hell was he a part of this? He and the Flame Colonel hardly found each others company welcoming, and still he had been lured here to do more damage than he wanted. He sighed, tossing the cloth in a nearby hamper while Riza lifted the kid into her arms, raising a bottle to the %u2018o%u2019 shaped mouth that Royce%u2019s lips seemed to be permanently shaped as.

Maes watched on, Riza cradling the baby to her chest as she sat down, supporting the bottle for him. It was just as how Roy had been, holding onto the bottle, drinking it, sitting in Maes%u2019 lap, comfortable. The content purrs that came from the man as he fell asleep, clinging to him%u2026

He turned away briefly, watching Havoc go outside, followed by Fuery who could never seem to leave the Lieutenant%u2019s side, especially when Maes was around. He wouldn%u2019t accept that he was soulless. He had feelings%u2026he wanted his Kitten back. Not even the baby could make up for what he lost.

%u201CHughes?%u201D Aru turned to Maes, holding up a ball on a string, jingling it lightly, the sound of bells coming from inside catching the little ones ears as well. Royce%u2019s ears twitched, opening his eyes and looking for the source of the sound. Though he didn%u2019t understand it, he knew that he wanted to learn about it, and that only made it that much more devastating to Hughes in the end. %u201COne of Roy%u2019s old toys.%u201D He said slowly.

Aru frowned. He hadn%u2019t meant to, but it seemed to happen whenever they found anything in the place that had once belonged to Roy, the homunculus shied away and immediately shut down. It wasn%u2019t Hughes. If he went off on his killing spree%u2026or threw things around, perhaps the atmosphere would have been a bit less tense. %u201CSorry.%u201D

%u201CStop being an idiot. There%u2019s nothing to be sorry about.%u201D Maes snapped.

Riza shifted Royce, not bothering to look up at him. He was being difficult again, as usual. She was hardly perturbed by his mood swings. %u201CDon%u2019t take that tone with him. He was simply apologizing. Taisa may be gone, but that gives you no right act in such a way. Think of the child before you yell out at someone. Do you want his baby to grow up to that?%u201D

Hughes certainly wasn%u2019t going to take that. However, he had to restraint himself. Riza held Royce in her arms. He could allow no harm to come to that child. Roy left it to him to care for and raise%u2026%u201DTch%u2026just shut up%u2026%u201D

Ed scoffed, hands going into his pockets. %u201CYou know%u2026I don%u2019t give a damn who you were to Mustang, or who that kid belongs to, but you had better stay out of trouble, because I won%u2019t hesitate.%u201D

Maes gave a small smirk. %u201CCare to try me, pipsqueak?%u201D

%u201CDon%u2019t say pipsqueak!%u201D

Maes snorted softly. %u201CYou, kid, annoy the hell out of me most of all. The way you treated Kitten on his first day back in work%u2026he wanted to hide. He was ashamed of himself. I will never let you get away with it. You%u2019re just lucky I can%u2019t kill you. Now, weren%u2019t we going to get things ready?%u201D

~*~

I saw him there. I didn%u2019t know what to think. I was in so much pain, I couldn%u2019t drag myself from the thoughts that consumed my mind, but he was the one I could see through it all. The stars that clouded my vision, the sour but rather metallic taste in my mouth signaling the urge to vomit, the lump in my throat that made it hard to breathe and swallow.

I didn%u2019t know who he was. It wasn%u2019t exactly human looking, and the face was just indistinct from anything I could scrounge from my memories, no matter how much I liked to think I knew him. He held an air of familiarity about him, and it helped my pain subside.

I was not the only one here. He was there, and he looked to be suffering as much as I had been, not to mention there were more animalistic groups in the cells around. I could smell them, hear their howls and squawks and clawing to get free, feel their apprehension, even taste the fear. It was a rush the moment the door opened, and I couldn%u2019t explain it all, really. I had no idea what was going on, and the only coherent thought I had at the time was the thought that I was going to die there. The pain was too much, but I could not muster the strength to end it myself.

The ground was cold. Hard. There was no comfort to seek in it. And at that moment, it was all I wanted. I just wanted to be warm, for someone to make the pain stop. The more I searched, the more I found myself sinking lower and lower into a sea of despair so thick and so black that it was worse than tar. I couldn%u2019t get out of it. I couldn%u2019t make my way back to the surface, the pressure seemed to grow, and it was crushing my body.

Just when I thought that the overwhelming weight on my chest and the darkness pressing against my eyes was too much to take, there were two lights. Purple-red in color, beautiful jewels that lit up the way. I felt a strange warmth in those eyes, despite my situation and what was going on. The sound that had been drowned out in my sea of despair returned, a sudden wave of heat flowing over my cool exposed flesh like a heavy blanket, and I was glad for it.

I looked up, the sight of those eyes giving me hope. I saw him. I found my strength in him...

Those irises%u2026I knew them, though they were none I had ever seen before. I reached out, not noticing my differences at the moment; I just wanted to touch him. He said nothing, just writhed and howled, but I could see no reason for his pain. We were the same%u2026I realized then. We both had meaningless existences. I wanted to touch him, to be assured I was not suffering alone, and that I had hope. You, Maes, were my only hope%u2026