This is something that I wrote a long time ago after I met my now husband. I originally posted it on another site under a pen name. I know it's not clean and gets really rough in places, I'm not a poet, please don't be hard in your critique, though I do encourage constructive crit.
Edit: For any who have seen this before, yes, it's been edited, I cleaned up a couple of typos, as well as changed a couple of words as they fit better (omitting a "the" or adding some small word similar to that). If you want to see the original please feel free to ask.
K
Comments
KimmerZ Says:
I think you wrote this beautifully girl. Even though it is rough, the emotions are definately powerful indeed. It is just sad that you had to have your emotions dragged through that spiral.
jeywolf Says:
Wow
d R A c LI tH Says:
Aw, this is well written, I love the emotion
Minstrel Ayreon Says:
I think it works out well. Writing a good poem doesn't mean having to disguise every line to where you don't know what it means--it can also mean, like in your case, telling a story that has a lot of power to it. Thank you very much for sharing.
neradayarose Says:
Sorry for the late comment, I've not been online for a while.
I absolutely love this though.