Holding his cigarette to the side
Balanced by his lips
Cheap Bottom Dollar Bandaids
Patching up his skin
Too Cheap to Buy clothes
Too Poor to Be cheap
Too much sex
creating too many mouthes to feed
Not enough money to satisfy his addictions
Running up bar tabs and telling tales
To anyone who'd listen
Whiskey on his clothes
And Breath laced with Mints
Too many street Fights
Not enough bloody fists
Gambling away savings
With Hopes to make it big
Been playing several years now
With Only One Win
Old Fashion New York
Souless as his shoes
Who Plays the devil's games
With Nothing to loose
Irish Charm
With His Own Italian Spice
He's a Bar Stool, Poker Fold Regular
In For life
>
Warning! This submission may contain mature content.
beutiful. glad to see some actual poetry instead of this whole "i hate my life" or "i'm so lonely" shit. this actually has creativity and is fun to read!
The line "With Nothing to loose" would fit better rythmically if you used "With Nothing left to loose" My only other problem with this is that you have all these melodramatic capitals in the first stanza that don't actually DO anything. I do like to use caps to show emphasis on words, but if you read it like that in this case is sounds very... awkward.*sp?*
I really rather like the way you've set this one up other than that. What's the title of the book so I can get a copy?
Comments
renner Says:
oh god, not the book with the kids that have batons shoved up their asses and guys pee in their oatmeal
Rennifer Says:
This is an awesome poem and would even make an awesome song >.>
imthe3vilpenguin Says:
beutiful. glad to see some actual poetry instead of this whole "i hate my life" or "i'm so lonely" shit. this actually has creativity and is fun to read!
Chiisuchina Mizuno Says:
Great poem. ^^
WiltingRose Says:
Just thought I'd say I like this one. It's so much better then a lot of the stuff that's been put on the front lately u.u;
Sylvia Says:
The line "With Nothing to loose" would fit better rythmically if you used "With Nothing left to loose" My only other problem with this is that you have all these melodramatic capitals in the first stanza that don't actually DO anything. I do like to use caps to show emphasis on words, but if you read it like that in this case is sounds very... awkward.*sp?*
I really rather like the way you've set this one up other than that. What's the title of the book so I can get a copy?