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Clarity of Vision
I sat in the cafe as I do every saturday, now. But something was different this day, of all days, my birthday and my death day. Human beings spend all thier lives being born and dying, day by day. And yet... and yet today I felt on the cusp of something that I couldn't understand. Something that my human mind could only glimpse. I had to ascend. It was with this thought that I turned my attention to the singer who was my reason for being here. I didn't know if she knew me or not, if she cared that I was here or not, but I cared. She made me think, so I listened.
After she'd gotten the mike working properly she brought the music up and began to sing, the drums a heart beat underneath her voice, and I knew. I Knew this was what I had come here for.
Overflowing senses
Heightened awareness
I hear my blood flow
I feel its caress
Whispering cosmos
Talking right to me
Unlimited, endless
God breathing through me
And I could feel every particle of my human body, I could feel it wrapped around my soul. I felt as if I was aware of every single atom of the air as it brushed my skin, and every cell of my body as it clung to every other. The interaction of every piece of myself, and every other thing was as clear to me as a raindrop is to the sun. Every atom of everything, animate or inanimate, living or nonliving. I rubbed against the universe as it slid past me. Myself a conduit for something far greater than I was, just as each atom of my body was part of something far larger than they. Every individual piece of myself as aware of itself and me as I was of myself and everything else.
See the microcosm
In macro vision
Our bodies moving
With pure precision
One universal celebration
One evolution
One creation
I could see every atom of myself as if each one was as large as a human being. Thier bonds being the same bonds of friendship and hate that bind human relations. All of it moving in the greatest dance ever un-choreographed, because for all it's beauty it was smooth yet unscripted. A million dancers so practiced and polite they had no chance of harming each other. And I was as large as the universe, I expanded to encompass a quadrillion dancers whose lives were as important as my own. I was a titan, I was a god. I had asended to the height of awareness, and I was All.
We rejoiced.
Thundering rhythm
Pounding within me
Driving me onwards
Forcing me to see
Clear and enlightening
Right there before me
Brilliantly shining
Intricate beauty
I could feel my heart beat, and it was the pluse of the world, radiating out from me to beat with the heart beat of the Universe. It was the drum to which the dancers set thier paces. And I could see the tiny interactions, and the large ones. My expansion had slowed and I looked outward from all the internal interactions that made me a god to the external interactions. The bonds of love and hate that bound my very planet to every other and made me, the god, the smallest of the small. Myself the tiniest atom of some god so much greater than myself that its make up included the very planets themselves, in some gigantic fractal that I could only see the smallest part of. Each atom of this god a planet on which a million gods like me lived. I had to wonder what gods lived on the face of my atoms, which must be planets to other gods as surely as my planet was to my god.
See the microcosm
In macro vision
Our bodies moving
With pure precision
One universal celebration
One evolution
One creation
Slowly, so slowly it hurt, I came back to myself. Again I became a sigular being attached unparticularly to any other. No longer a god, nor the humblest particle of a god. Just myself. Some being that had glimpsed its place in the universe only to be brought back again to nothing, to where it had started.
I only hoped I'd be a little happier for what I had gained and lost.
I finished my coffee, paid, and left.
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