[ Romantic Cheapskate ]

This is from when had her birthday. I got myself and three other artists to draw a birthday picture and upload it on her birthday. It was great.

[ Happy Birthday, Poptart! ]

I'll read you poetry I'll tell you what I know to be true
I'll make a sentimental observation about the moon
I'll kiss you so that you could think that kisses are sublime
But I won't spend a penny 'cause
All that you're worth is my time.

I got this relationship with [Poptart] we go way back
and we never broke up but months'll go by when I don't call back
and [ Poptart ]'s on my answering machine crying, drunk on a weeknight
begging me just to sneak by
I keep bypassing the fashionable titles,
unbridling beats this thick plus dope recital
only once per blue moon, coincidental with a typhoon
of votes in my favor and doom
for any rival of romantic intent
no matter how I treat her [ Poptart ] loves me best
even though I never once took her someplace nice
all I ever gotta do is look her deep in the eyes
open up the trap, let the romance flow
and [ Hatter ] has got her good to go.

I'll read you poetry I'll tell you what I know to be true
I'll make a sentimental observation about the moon
I'll kiss you so that you could think that kisses are sublime
But I won't spend a penny 'cause
All that you're worth is my time.

I come from the old school of the song fight where you must win
it wasn't polite back then to talk about what band who's in
just get in the ring and it had better sound a little
like you know how to sing
or else what you wasting my time for?
I don't get like "free internet"
my bandwidth's limited
I mean in steaddd of this, I could be fishing for pr0ns
with my dick out. all kinds of opportunities stick out
in my mind when I consider not clicking
this list of your lame ass eight times cause you're that tricky
and nobody knocks twice for these songs you tape
except by mistake, and hit escape
then again I love every single worthless last one of you
you're like a bottomless drain for my invective to funnel through
and you can call her every week, you won't win the heart
[ Poptart ] was [ Hatter ]'s win from the start.

I'll read you poetry I'll tell you what I know to be true
I'll make a sentimental observation about the moon
I'll kiss you so that you could think that kisses are sublime
But I won't spend a penny 'cause
All that you're worth is my time.

Now for the rest of you song fight types up long nights
trying to get the solo right, hope somebody on the boards is nice
holds your hand, says it's okay that [ Hatter ] always wins
that your song isn't necessarily shallow and thin
like one of the rest of you said in the review thread
hoping to earn [ Poptart ]'s love and respect
nevertheless, the actual fact of the situation
[ Poptart ] is stingier than I am, and she's patient
she waits when she has to for [ Hatter ] to come
endures bunk songs that would knock many wooees numb
but not my [ Poptart ], she's ever vigilant
I stick my tongue in her butthole and wiggle it
even though I call her up collect for phone sex
[ Hatter ] jumps the line, comes next
and all y'all with your big bouquets could wait out here
while I whisper sweet nothing rhymes
up in her ear, never you fear [ Poptart ]
I'm holding you dear.