At peace

At peace

Heels echoing on the wooden floor
The scent of perfume and cologne drifting about the air
Ice landing in a glass quickly followed by liquid pouring in
Bits of banter and loud laughter
The shuffle and mix ended with the jingle of keys
(It looks like we're leaving.)

Car doors slam one after the other
Adjusting knobs and buttons, too much movement
Seat belts buckle and my head hurts
A comment is made and tension fills the air
(This drive will probably be quiet.)

A knock on the door reveals the mayhem inside.
More laughter and banter, this time with callous undertones.
(Maybe those undertones have always been there.)

The brushing of lips and warmth of embrace, family.
Attention is set on me, my hair, it's different
My face is on fire and it won't stop
(A long night..)

Drifting in and out, exchanging few words, nothing to say
Lost in thought, constantly surprised, on edge
Hours pass and I'm waiting now
In my comfort zone but I feel stretched
(It's time.)

Sloppy goodbyes and more laughter
Car doors again followed by noise
Something was said but it didn't reach me
My head still hurts
(Almost home?)

Somethings wrong, I can feel it
Mad movement and quick shouting
Is it the car or the drinks or- flash, it was a flash
I can feel something warm coming out
So warm....I just want to sleep
Loud noises, shouting and crying
Is someone hurt? I can't see anymore
Now I feel it, something inside of me
a chunk of metal through me, the edges are burning hot
Sirens wake me up and I cough up more warmth
I love you too mom, dad
I don't think you heard though
Someones pushing on my eyelids, make them stop
I cant sleep here I'm not home yet
the burning is numbing and what feeling I had in my limbs is gone
with every exhale I feel my soul leaving me
I know there's a lot going on but i feel at peace now
I'm going to my own party and you aren't invited
I feel happy and my head no longer hurts.
It seems this is goodbye.
(Hey...I'm home now.)