"Bad Juju" Part 15

"Bad Juju" Part 15

Dinner was a debacle in itself. Ace found himself constantly turning to Guildy, who spent most of the meal talking with his mouth full, for a quick note on which fork to use or whether or not it was polite to drink from the fingerbowl. Ace ate and drank very little for fear that he might do something horribly and inexcusably taboo. He had to admit, he really didn't like awkwardness. He heard people around him attributing it to "butterflies." Hiram continued to engage him about more intimate details his life, which he answered to the best of his ability with "yes," "no," and "possibly." Each time Hiram spoke, his voice was just a little too clear and perfect. His southern drawl was just too refined. Ace still wanted to just knock this guy down a few notches, using his fist. He was so glad when the whole thing was over.

While everyone else had retired to the grand sitting room to relax and be merry, Ace found himself on the Veranda, spacing in front of Guildy who was lying splayed across a wicker bench, nearly engulfing it. Ace twisted the fabric of his skirt in his hands.

"When am I gonna' have to make a decision, man? I'm gettin' impatient!" Ace stopped and glared down at Guildy, who chuckled and slowly rose to a graceful sitting position.

"Ace, mijn lieve jongen, zoon! Zoon ve may go!" A shot rang off in the distance, spurring a cloud of blackbirds to fly from the branches of a nearby magnolia.

"What the hell was that, man?"

"I haven't ze zlightest-" Another shot. "Oktober shall go investigate." Before he could even get himself off the bench (which was , however, the sound of heavy footfalls came nearer by the second. A man was running toward the house waving a shotgun, something tawny-orange swinging and bouncing in his other hand.

"Mr. Irving! Mr. Irving! I got that damn fox! I got 'im!" The guy hollered. The moment he came within feet of the veranda, however, he stopped dead in his tracks. He immediately flung his hand and the corpse it held behind his back, a few drops of blood hitting the dirt behind him. "Oh, hell, Ms. Irving. I didn't mean to-"

"It iz no problem, votzoever!" Guildy sprung to his feet and adjusted his posture to that of female seduction: butt out, boobs up, stomach in, shoulders back. He drifted over to the railing and leaned over it.

"Well, hullo, Hildegard," the guy grinned to reveal charming straight teeth and the absence of a single tooth.

"Greetings, Chezter," so this was Chester Van Houten. He spoke with the terse accent of an old-time city-boy. The cap upon his head was threadbare and dirty. In fact, he was dirty: positively covered in filth and grime. However, there was still a charming air about him. The way he squinted when he talked, his high cheekbones, the sandy brown hair that fell just a little too long under his hat. His smile was sunny and even his gestures indicated that he was very genuine. Ace immediately made the connection: it was no wonder Abigaille had chosen to run off with this guy. He was the sort of guy who'd make a great drinking buddy, with his cheerful disposition and ornery-streak a mile-and-a-half wide.

"Really, Chester, it's no problem," Ace said automatically.

"I just thought you might be... offended by it, that's all."

"Offended? Lord no!" Ace's voice trilled. Chester chuckled brightly. Ace's gaze fell to the shotgun at Chester's side. It appeared to be a Winchester, in great condition and quite possibly very new. "Gonna' shoot anything else, tonight?" Chester's eyes widened.

"Well, no. Nothin' living. Maybe some bottles off the fence, if you'd like to watch."

"Like to? Ve'd love to!" Guildy leaned farther yet over the railing, making certain to show off the swells of his ample breasts and pleasantly curved line of their cleavage. There was something endearing about the crush Guildy had on Chester and his efforts to further it, until Ace remembered that Guildy was still very mentally male. He felt a little sick to his stomach, but opted not to say anything.

"Follow me, then. Before it gets too dark," Chester motioned for the "ladies" to join him. Guildy plucked Ace from his spot and practically carried him down the painted white steps to the dirt sidewalk below.

"Ready when you are, I suppose," Ace's voice fluttered girlishly. Chester grinned widely, showing a tiny bit of deviousness. He was beaming as if he'd met the girl of his dreams.