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The Fortress
I can see you.
You’re laughing.
Laughing at me?
No.
You can’t see me.
No-one can.
Good.
***
I tried to console myself against the short impulses of words that carved daggers into my soul, tearing and ripping and shredding. It was difficult. Words could sometimes be blocked by that invisible shield of strength that came from within. Once put in place, it could protect you from the hurt of the dangerous world of words. Perhaps, that was the beginning of my problem. In fact, I almost knew it was. I had placed my shield up for too long. It was no longer a shield. It was a fortress that encased me. It was my solitude. I couldn’t hear your hurtful words anymore, but my own echoed through the walls of the fortress, amplified by the emptiness. My words hurt more than yours.
Peering through the small window of my fortress, I saw you. You were sad. You were happy. Emotions shifted on your face like seasons. I liked it. It was different to mine. Within my fortress, I kept my emotions locked in the dungeons. They were still there. No matter what people said, I knew that they existed. They were locked away so they could be protected. My emotions were kept safe inside. One day, I could not place when; I heard my emotions screaming in turmoil. They wanted to be set free, but I refused them. I only wanted to shield them.
My emotions sought revenge on me. They whispered words. The words manifested inside me as seeds of self-hate. In time, the hate sprouted. It leeched energy from me, and grew stronger. I had only myself to blame. I had only myself to hate.
With vines of hate travelling up my body, I saw you through my small window. I wanted help. Pain was invading my fortress. You needed to help. Then I remembered... you couldn’t see me. No one could see through walls of my fortress. What a terrible revelation it was! The world moved without me; and I, imprisoned here, moved without the world. Maybe I did not exist at all. But I did. Maybe I shouldn’t have.
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Comments
pur plec loud Says:
D: I understand this way too well.
BREAK OUT OF THE FORTRESSSSS
Kiwi Joy Says:
Your writing here is the best it's ever been. Everything, every sentence, every word, is perfect.
I'm not keen on the subject of the writing, but it is portrayed extremely well :3 Awesome stuff.
Nakai Says:
Love the description and the structure of your sentences and your writing this is so beautiful!!! Its amazing! ^^
What a great emotive piece. I used to feel like that alot, I'm glad I was finally allowed to break out.
KeithKeiser Says:
That seems to have manifested how most people are nowadays, and often how I feel about myself.
But it is a very great descriptive piece on the human emotion.
Yet again, your imagery is magnificent, because I had images constantly running through my mind while reading this.
takekate Says:
God I love your writing it's so fantastical, some people just really have a knack for writing and I think you do.
BREAK DOWN THOSE WALLS. ; O;
No really this is so sad and true I think a lot of people can relate to this. Such imagery and desperation, your writing is full of emotion. C: