White Ink (pt.6)

White Ink (pt.6)

I spend most of the day ignoring Josh and he spends most of the day acting guilty. It’s about six in the evening when I decided I can’t stand any more of this.
“Josh,” I say quietly.
Josh looks up at me, seeming almost timid.
I sigh. “I’m not angry.”
He looks confused for a moment. “You aren’t?”
I shake my head. “No. I’m not happy, but I’m not angry. I got rid of everything. The old prescriptions. I don’t know why I didn’t do it before. Next time you’re worried, talk to me.”
“I’m an idiot,” Josh mumbles at the floor.
“Yeah, you are.” I’m not going to argue with him when he’s so obviously right. “I know you meant well, but that was stupid. Let’s go for a walk.”
Josh stares at me, blinking as though trying to figure out what just happened. When I get to the door he finally gets up and follows me. I ignore him for the first ten minutes until he puts a hand on my shoulder.
“Mikey,” he says, but I cut him off.
“Josh, shut up. Just don’t talk right now. I don’t want your explanation. I’m not angry, so just be quiet.”
He stares at me, hurt evident in his expression. I sigh and bow my head.
“Josh, what you did? It was stupid. Really stupid. I’m trusting you, you know. Just respect my decisions.
“I’m no good at this. Look, just take it for what it is.”
Josh looks at me for a moment, then asks, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
I shake my head and smile. “Don’t worry about it. Come on.”
I take his hand and drag him down the street and for once he doesn’t ask questions. Doesn’t want to know where we’re going or why or what we’re doing when we get there, and I know that for once he feels the way that I always do. Because none of those things matter. What matters to him right now is that I’m not angry and I still trust him and he’s not going to question something like that. So he shuts up and follows me and I’m happy with that.

When we get home I curl up on the couch and Josh lays down beside me with his head on my knee and just looks at me. I absent-mindedly play with his hair. I always do that. It’s soft, I can’t help it.
“You’re really not mad?” he asks.
I shake my head. “No. Just drop it.”
He nods. “We have school in the morning.”
I groan. “Don’t remind me.”
Josh chuckles and sits up. “You know, sometimes I wonder how you keep such good grades with your attitude.”
I blow on my nails and rub them on my shirt, the way characters in cheesy tv shows do. “Pure talent.”
“You’re an ass,” he says, punching me playfully in the shoulder.
“And you’re a stupid jerk,” I reply, acting unfazed.
“Good,” he says. “Then we’re even.”
We stare at each other for a moment before we burst out laughing. This goes on for a while before we lapse into a comfortable silence. I, however, am not good with silence.
“You know, if we were in one of those cheesy old movies, you’d be the hero with more heart than brains who rescues the damsel in distress tied to the railroad tracks,” I say, looking at Josh.
Josh looks miffed. “Yeah, well you’d be the damsel I’d be saving from the train.”
I shake my head and grin. “No I wouldn’t. I’d be the villain who tied her there in the first place. I mean, she probably deserved it.”
Josh grins back. “In that case, I think we need to rewrite the end of the movie.”
He pecks me on the cheek and then scoops me off the couch, spinning me in a circle.
“Put me down!” I protest loudly. But Josh just laughs. And then spins faster. Josh has this amazing sense of balance. You could spin him in circles all day and he wouldn’t get dizzy. Me on the hand, let’s just say I’m not that coordinated.
Josh puts me down and I promptly stumble and fall over. Josh catches me, laughing.
“You’re not funny,” I scold.
“We have school in the morning,” Josh reminds me.
“Aww, it’s only midnight,” I protest.
Josh smirks. “Yes, well, some of us actually sleep.”
I don’t mention that the creature is watching us. There’s no point. I know Josh doesn’t think I’m crazy, but he doesn’t take these things seriously, either. He can’t see them so he isn’t concerned by them. I follow Josh down the hall, not looking behind me. Even if I could sleep, I wouldn’t want to. Not with the dog watching me.