Sheezy Exclusive Crazy Adventures Saga1 Ep11 Pt1

Sheezy Exclusive Crazy Adventures Saga1 Ep11 Pt1

Episode 11 Part 1

Why hello, you sillies! I am back at last! My writer's block is about to get its ass royally kicked right out of the park!

<proofreads> Okay let's see here....uh huh....alright, that one kinda sucked. How's about we put them on the road again, but this time to a port where they can go underwater? You guys haven't seen Nic's underwater form yet. Or any of their underwater forms for that matter.

HL Bus

Lugia: <so bored as hell> UUUGH....so sick of driving this bus. Are we ANYWHERE near civilization yet!? I wanna go back to the tower! At least something happens than just driving! My ass is getting numb!

Nicolette: Shut the hell up and keep driving. There's a port up here.

Lugia: Oh great. Another port. <sarcastic perky voice> Maybe we can see the yacht again! Oh that would be so delightful! <normal> PFT. I'd rather hang myself by the balls on a vine over a pit of molten strawberry candy stuffs with extravegantly gay sharks living in it.

Nicolette: <aims a spellbook's spine at the back of Lugia's head> THAT CAN BE ARRANGED.

Lugia: ._. ...... <gulp> .......shutting up....

Nicolette: <puts away spellbook and floats over to Articuno> Has your boyfriend ever experienced something traumatizing that's made him so depressed or something? Because he's SO annoying!

Articuno: I know I know...it's nothing in his past, he's just really tired of driving the bus is all. He'll feel better once he's out from behind the wheel.

Nicolette: I'll kick him out if he continues his whining...

Articuno: <gets powers ready> I'd like to see you try...

Nicolette: Well go ahead then!

Articuno: <uses Ice Beam>

<move covers Nicolette, the driver's seat back window and the driver's seat floor>

Lugia: Woah! Hey, settle down back there! You nearly froze my feet to the pedals!

Articuno: Oops! Sorry, sweetie!

Nicolette: <frozen with a retarded expression on her face> .....

Nic: <melts ice> I'll take care of her. <teleports her to Nic's room for punishment(very wacky punishment)> So by the way, what made you think about coming with us? I mean I know you have to look out for Lugia, but what inspired you to fight?

Articuno: Basically, it's because of my relationship with Lugia, and also because I'm tired of taking shit from everyone. I've had a very bad week trying to find him...

Nic: What about Shadow Lugia? Is he getting to you?

Articuno: Not really. He seems to be behaving...even though sometimes he really scares me...with those piercing red eyes...

Veemon: One time he tried to choke me by making me swallow my DS.

Guilmon: And he tried to make me drink Clorox.

Nic: Well that's because-

Zorak: And he broke my flamethrower!

Moltar: And busted my keyboard!

Zorak: Uh...that's probably for the best, man.

Moltar: Shut up.

Jake: AND HE KILLED THE GARDEN GNOMES

Dr. Velocity and Dr. Lawnmowers: <toppled onto each other for some reason> NOES!!! D8

Sonicsaber: I SWEAR TO MARY, I'M ABOUT TO LIMIT BREAK YOUR ASSES!!!! <aims zchweihander(VERY BIG-BLADED SWORD) at Jake, Dr. Velocity, Dr. Lawnmowers and Banjo>

Banjo: ...but I didn't say anything! :(

Kazooie: <steps in front of Jake> You're not hurting Jake! He's so adorable!

Jake: <blushes again> ....

Kazooie: <takes Jake and carries him to where she was sitting> <snuggles>

Jake: -w-...

Sonicsaber: o.O...? <looks to the rest>

Rest of the Heroes: .... <shrug>

Sonicsaber: <looks back to Jake> Am I missing something?

Nicolette: <yells from Nic's room> LET ME OUTTA HERE!!! <kicks open the door> <tries to get out but is getting pulled back by the Nic Clones> THESE FUCKERS ARE CRAZY!!!

Nic: What're they doing!?

Nicolette: I DON'T KNOW, YOU CREATED THEM, NIC!!!

Nic: Stop it right now!

Nic Clones: O_O!!! <drop Nicolette>

Nic: Now which one of you started this?

Nic Clone 82: .... <cautiously raises hand>

Nic: 2 hours of time out for you.

Nic Clones 82: <slouches in defeat>

Nic: As for the rest of you, go easy on her next time! It's not like she's tried to kill my husband or anything!

Nic Clone 21: Which one?

Nic: The one you girls keep turning into each night. Remember? The sexy Charizard I'm married to?

Nic Clones: <chatters like "Oh yeah" and "now I remember" and about Hadouken Charizard's sexiness>

Nic: Okay, CUT IT OUT. Save it for tonight or something. <floats away> <turns back quickly> And don't make the room shake, you kept us up last night!

Nic Clones: <nod>

Nic: Now go back to what you were doing.

Nic Clones: <leave>

Zorak: That must be a lot to handle, even though it's all just you you're handling.

Nic: It's easier than you think, all you do is just go about your business and tell them what to do. However, I'm more compassionate than that, so I tend to spend some time with my clones when I can. And I usually do.

Zorak: That's some creepy egotistics, Nic. VERY CREEPY.

Nic: <unamused> What the hell do you want, Zorak?

Zorak: Nothin.

Dr. Lawnmowers: NO ONE INSULTS THE SILLY PINK WOLF!!! <takes Zorak's flamethrower and pistol whips him with it>

Zorak: <falls over unconscious>

Nic: <sigh> I don't know why everyone's such an asshole today! What do you think will make them feel better?

Dr. Lawnmowers: For one, take away the soreness.

Nic: <takes away numbness of sitting for nigh on 5 hours> Then what?

Dr. Lawnmowers: TURN ON SOME MUSIC!!!

Nic: Sweet idea! <turns on some Motley Crue>

Nicolette: HELL YA, THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN ABOUT <dances>

Heroes cept Lugia: <get up and dance>

Lugia: <looks back and smiles> *I love it when Nic tries to cheer everyone up.*

Some Port

HL Bus: <drives in and parks>

Port Workers: Come on, get your asses out there! There's something really bad happening in the ocean!

Lugia: <climbs out of the bus with the others> Really? What?

Port Worker1: Somethin's rumbing and-a shakin and-a tremorin down there!

Port Worker2: We're worried it's the planet's mantle causin an underwater earthquake!

Valderis: Hmm....something I haven't felt for ages....so familiar, yet I can't put my finger on it.

Zorak: Bet you can STICK your finger UP it. <smug>

Shadow Lugia: <punches out Zorak> Who told you to talk, bug?

Valderis: ...some kind of rumbling around. Something's moving violently down there.

Nic: Then should we go ahead and dive?

Zorak: Um...in case you didn't notice, we're air-breathers.

Nic: <floats near the water> Not for loooong... <jumps into the water>

Lugia: Hey wait, I'm comin with ya!

Nicolette: <chases after Lugia> Well, you guys coming or what!?

Jake: PIE, GODDAMMIT!!! OH THE GLORIOUS CREAM FILLING AND THE-

Sonicsaber: <bitchslaps Jake with a printer> SHUT! UP!

Jake Kay.

Dr. Velocity: ARRGH, ME MATIES!!! WE GOIN DOWN BELOW DECK LIKE THE DROWNIN BETSY, YAR!!!

Sonicsaber: ...dude...just no.

Veemon: YAR!!!

Sonicsaber: No! We're not pi-

Guilmon: FUCK YEAH!!! TREASURE HUNTING AND ONE PIECE!!!

Sonicsaber: <does that anime big head yelling thing> WE'RE NOT PIRATES!!!!

Retarded Heroes: ._. .....

Nicolette: <sticks her head out the water> While we're young! <dives back down>

Heroes: <look at each other and shrug> <jump on in carrying Zorak>

Moltar: My helmet is going to get SO rusty...

Underwater

Nic: <turned into her merwolf form with pink dolphin tail(with a shirt on, you pervert)> See? What'd I tell ya? Don't I look pretty? <poses>

Heroes: <stare in awe> ......

Zorak: <in a diver suit> ....I cannot believe my eyes....am I high or something?

Nic: You're cute when you're shocked like that.

Zorak: SUCK ME.

Nicolette: <same, only it's a jet black fishtail with some creepy bones poking out the back as some kinda spine, wearing a sports bra> Okay, so what're we looking for again? I wasn't paying proper attention.

Heroes: <stare at Nicolette's tail> ....

Nicolette: What?

Veemon: <turned into a shark-tailed merdigimon like Guilmon> ...dude...your tail's scary.

Nicolette: So? That's your opinion. It seems somebody's not played enough Devil May Cry to stomach my merwolf form.

Nic: Um, can we all focus on finding the source of that rumbling sensation Valderis felt?

Dr. Velocity: <in Chaos 4 form> WOOT!!! I'M A SHARK, YOU SILLIES!!! I SNIFF OUT KOOL-AID FROM MILES!!!

Zorak: ...that's blood you're talking about.

Moltar: Speaking of which, doesn't Nicolette usually drink that?

Nicolette: Only when I'm feeling especially unforgiving with murdering a target from my list. Other than that, don't touch the stuff. Now that the mystery of my mindset is solved, LET'S GET GOING, PLEASE. I want to get into the villains' base sometime this Ice Age!

Nic: Okay, I know it's hard, but just have patience. We need to find where it's coming from.

Valdeis: Hmm....we just need to go swimming downwards.

Veemon: Cool! Just like in the video games!

Guilmon: You get to swim downwards and upwards and stuff in 2 dimensions!

Nicolette: <mocking> YOU GET TO SWIM DOWNARDS AND UPWARDS AND STUFF IN-

Lugia: <punches out Nicolette> Shut up!

Nicolette:

Nic: Good thing I gave your fist Holy Water.

Valderis: But the viewers need to know what's coming up next.

Monty Python Giant: Yes, yes, get on with it!

Monty Python French Castle People: Get on with it!

Monty Python Knight Army: GET ON WITH IT

2 Hours Later

Lugia: Jesus, this ocean runs deep!

Articuno: Well Neo Mobius is a pretty big planet. Basically, they say in Astronomy that the bigger the planet, the deeper the oceans.

Veemon: If they have them.

Kazooie: <in a diving mech with Banjo> Why did I have to get in this thing with him...T.T

Banjo: This is like a movie I saw! 8D

Kazooie: Yeah yeah yeah, just don't fart and you're allowed to be in here where there's air.

Banjo: Kay.

Veemon: Hey, Articuno? How come you can breathe underwater?

Articuno: I'm a pokemon of ice, so it's natural that I'd have this kind of thing.

Zorak: Gee, what's next I wonder? How about where babies come from? Or how women pee?

Nic: Everyone who's arguing better stop it within the next few minutes or I will lock you guys in the bus! You're really starting to get on my nerves!

Shadow Lugia: Does Zorak usually bitch like this?

Nicolette: What do you care? You're too busy bullying up on Veemon and Guilmon wrestling them down.

Lugia: ...that's such a wonderful sentence, Nicolette.

Nicolette: Not like that, IDIOT, I mean the WWF kinda wrestling!

Lugia: OH, THAT kinda wrestling! Why do you always do that to them instead of me?

Shadow Lugia: Because you're driving. I don't wanna die on the road.

Lugia: By the way, have you guys noticed that Authur hasn't been picking on Shadow Lugia yet?

Well, then. Ask and ye shalt receive. <gives Shadow Lugia a wedgie and crams Zorak and Moltar into the underwear>

Shadow Lugia: <obviously panicking> OH GOD WHAT'S THAT IN MY ASS!!??

Zorak: AUTHUR, I SWEAR TO GOD, WHEN THIS IS OVER, YOU WILL HAVE YOUR HEAD VIOLENTLY DISCONNECTED FROM YOUR BODY AND SHOVED UP-

Nic: <teleports Zorak to the bus and locks it> I'm not dealing with that today.

Moltar: Uh...help?

Nic: <K gets him outta there> How come you're so laidback?

Moltar: I just seem to not care. Why?

Nic: Meh, just curious.

And now, plot advancement! Oh and Shadow Lugia fixed his wedgie.

Dr. Velocity: PURPLE WATER BIRDIE NEEDS TO CHANGE HIS UNDIES!!!

Nicolette: <hides behind Nic with Sonicsaber> My eyes...

Valderis: We're getting closer! It's some kind of underwater creature!

Nicolette: What, a whale?

Valderis: Much bigger than that.

Guilmon: A golem?

Valderis: No, but you're on the right track.

Veemon: A WHALE GOLEM!!?? 8D

Valderis: ....

Dr. Velocity, Dr. Lawnmowers and Jake: A MUTANT PIE!!??

Valderis: Why did I get stolen out of my resting place...

<huge rumble>

Heroes: <suddenly stop swimming>

Nic and Nicolette: <scan their surroundings>

Nicolette: It's right below us! <teleports everyone away from it>

<a huge castle(no, not Castelvania, thank god) rises from the ocean>

Villains: WOOT <fly to it>

Heroes: <appear still in their underwater forms away from the castle> <swim up to the surface and take a look>

Valderis: I know that castle anywhere! That's the castle of Heppomatrus VIII! If we don't get there fast, they'll plunder the place, the castle will fall right back into the ocean off of its plate, and who knows what kind of damage this will do to your beautiful planet!?

Nicolette: <devious smile> I love it when the stakes get higher. It's more exciting.

Heppomatrus Castle: Courtyards

Heroes: <out of their underwater forms searching the courtyards for the Villains>

Tial: *By the way, I swear to god you've made the weirdest friends in Existence.*

Lugia: *Pretty much.*

Ben(Lugia and Tial's son as well as apprentice Reaper): *Daddy, be careful! This castle has old traps, but some of them still work!*

Tial: *Oh yeah, how could I forget that...hope you're up for it. Then again you'll be fine, because Nic and Nicolette are with you.*

Lugia: *By the way, why don't you come over here?*

Tial: *...nah. It's boring over there. Besides, I've still got work to do.*

Lugia: *Oh...well we can't keep him waiting, can we?*

Tial: *That I learned the hard way. Anyway we will meet again...it's a matter of when.*

Lugia: *Okay. Bye, honey.*

Tial: <hangs up>

Nicolette: You two still married?

Lugia: Why wouldn't we be? She loves me, remember? And so does Articuno.

Nicolette: Wow. You lead a very complicated love/sex life. Spend less time in front of the tv, fatty.

Nic: I'm going to take away everyone's ability of speech if you guys keep it up. I've seriously had it with everyone's bitching today.

Shadow Lugia: By the way, what's up with the necklace?

Kaijun: Haven't we told you before? We're going to find its resting place.

Shadow Lugia: What if we don't?

Kaijun: ....are you slow?

Shadow Lugia: Shut up.

Kaijun: You really are a stereotype, aren't you? I should've noticed from the way you act like a fratboy.

Veemon: I think it's safe to say that we beat the bad guys here.

Nic: Whew...that's a relief. Well let's just fortify the defenses so they don't try anything funny. <magically casts a barrier over all the treasure in the area>

Nicolette: Hmm.....I'm thinkin we got here REALLY early. What do you think we should do with the place?

Valderis: Nothing.

Guilmon: Start a Dunkin Donuts chain!

Valderis: ...what.

Sonicsaber: Build torture devices and use them against you the next time you make a coherent sentence that has the word "donut" in it!

Guilmon: ._. ....

Veemon: ....donut?

Sonicsaber: Don't tempt me.

Dr. Velocity: OH GOD IT'S THE EVIL MACARONI AND CHEESE DINOSAUR <hides down Shadow Lugia's shirt>

Shadow Lugia: Get out of there.

Dr. Lawnmowers: <sticks his head out of SL's shirt> You talkin to me, silly?

Shadow Lugia: AAAAH!!! <throws Dr. Lawnmowers out of there>

Dr. Velocity: <sticks out of SL's pants> THIS GAG IS FUN, LOLS

Shadow Lugia: <throws Dr. Velocity> GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY PANTS, BRO

Articuno: <backs up a bit looking worried>

Dr. Lawnmowers: We don't do that to girls.

Articuno: Whew...

Lugia: You really shouldn't be all that worried about Dr. Lawnmowers. He's pretty much just like Dr. Velocity, only an Eon Dragon.

Nicolette: <looking somewhat astonished> Um...do you two happen to have a severe case of ADD? 'Cause that's what I keep getting when I scan your brains. <suddenly sees they're not there> ...what the-

Dr. Lawnmowers: <breaks through the ground with his head and ends up hitting Nicolette in the babyhole pretty hard> RANDOM CHARACTER PLACEMENT!!!

Nicolette: <screaming in pain with a contorted look on her face> <holds her vagina in pain and falls to the ground> <rolls around>

Shadow Lugia: ...where's Dr. Velocity? <looks down shirt and looks down pants> He's not in my clothes.

Kaijun: Not in mine.

Dr. Velocity: <falls on top of Veemon and Guilmon> That was fun!

Dr. Robotnik: <from afar> THAT'S FOR POPPING UP LIKE THAT IN MY PANTS, YOU SEXUALLY CONFUSED PIECE OF GREEN JELLO!!!

Lugia: ...he did WHAT!!??

Kaijun: It's official. Dr. Velocity knows no fear. Whatsoever.

Okay, one more random thing and it's on to fighting time.

<camera whoosh right>

Muscular Fanboy Dressed As Cloud Strife: <pretty much going out of his mind wearing a PlayStation on his head> <eyes bloodshot> <hopping around hyperactive and stuffs> <staring at a copy of Crisis Core he glued to the wall> HEH...GREEEEEAT!!! IT'S GREEEEEEEEEEAT!!! <breaks down the wall by running into it and falls on the ground>

<insert WWII bigass explosion footage>

You know, Square Enix, technically you brought this upon yourselves. Just thought you should know that.

AND NOW THE PLOT ADVANCES BY FIGHTING SCENES!!!

5 hours of investigation later

Nicolette: If I don't get something to beat up soon, I'm going to snap! Is this place desolate or something!?

<enemies suddenly surround them>

Hades: sup lols :3

<long fighting montage of awesomeness as the castle forms a barrier around itself and progressively sends both the Heroes and the Villains into space, unbeknownst to either>

Tial: <appears outside the barrier and knocks on it, interrupting>

Heroes and Villains: <pause and look up at her>

Tial: You guys do realize you're in space, right?

Heroes and Villains: O_O;......

Banjo: <girly scream> <runs around in a circle panicking>

Kazooie: EARHOLES...HURT...>_<

Tial: That's because I brought you a-holes up here. This castle is delicate, and should be handled accordingly! So get the hell off of it! <throws castle back into the ocean>

Articuno: ...wanna take this somewhere else?

Dr. Wily: Yeah that might be good. >.>

Underwater

Heroes: <back in their underwater forms>

Villains: <in some kind of evil sub mech>

Bowser: Now this is going to be interesting! Let's see how you take something big like this underwater! <evil laugh>

Veemon: ...we're screwed, right?

Nic: Just leave it to me and Nicolette. <casts protective barrier around the other heroes> <turns to the sub> As for you guys... <swims around them fast enough to create a whirlpool>

Villains: <screaming, obviously>

Nicolette: <turns into a big wrecking ball and smacks them right out of the ocean and back to base> <turns back to merwolf> Well now that we prevented an ancient castle from being plundered, what should we do now?

Nic: Wait for their next plot, I guess. I don't really see any point in advancing any further.

Lugia: But where're we gonna sleep?

Nic: We'll find some city nearby.

Lugia: Okay, but there better be robbers to beat up. It gets boring after a while.

In a nearby city I honestly forget the name of that's apparently French

some big hotel

Lugia: <apparently rooming with Articuno> <walks into the room and lies down on the bed>

Shadow Lugia: <storms in and gives Lugia an atomic wedgie> Mind if I borrow this, bro!?

Lugia: GAAAH, GET THE HELL OUT OF MY ROOM!!!

Articuno: <kicks SL away and freezes him>

Shadow Lugia: <frozen in place> O_O....

Authur: Hmmm....should we end it here?

Nicolette: Yeah, maybe. That looks like a good spot.

Then stay tuned for the next part of the episode, you guys!