|
|
You got one shot
This writing was made to post on deviantART, so excuse where I mention DA.
-------------
Ok, so here's my little "love story"
Way back when about a year ago when I was a Junior in the crappiest High School in the state of Maine, I sat next to probably the only woman who was for me in the entire world. Do you believe in love at first sight? Well, I do. I believe that there is only one person that is the other half of your soul, the only person in the entire existance of humanity that can complete you. Sure, there is people who come close, but not your exact soul mate. I think I've found mine.
So, like I was saying, it was love at first sight. I couldn't believe how...just...beautiful this woman was. It was like...I can't even begin to describe it. Anyways, I walk into the room (First day back from summer vacation) and find that my seat is assigned right next to hers. Can you believe that luck? Well anyways, I was also seated right next to a good friend of mine who was also a TA. Oh yeah, I should say this right now, this class was Web Page Design, and I was a TA (Teachers assistant - We do the teachers job while she sits on her ass drinking coffee. It's cool to be a Ta though because it gives you another credit and you get to meet a bunch of new people, plus, it's like taking the same class over again, except you know what you are doing right from the start you kinda feel powerful. You're a teacher man!) which meant that I would be helping people.
So, anyways, this girl was unbelieveable. She liked all the same stuff I did! On the first day she was wearing a red linkin park T-shirt, and I just happened to have bought some linkin park shoes, so right there, it was an instant conversation topic. But I kinda messed that up like that the beginning of class when we were talking about bands. She was talking about some bands and said something about linkin park, but I though she said something about a different band that I didn't like, so like a ideot, I blurted out, "What? How could you like them? Linkin Park sucks!" She went from super cheery mood to "I'm gonna rip your balls off" mood in 0.002 seconds flat. The look she gave me kinda made me want to crawn into a corner and die. It felt like she stabbed me. Seriously, I think my heart skipped a beat. After I realized what I had said, I quickly sputered out "What? What the hell did I just say? I love linkin park! I love 'em so much I bought their shoes!". I then proceded to take off my shoes and hand them to her so she could inspect them. She giggled and handed them back. I then quickly turned to Joe (The other TA who sits next to me, he is like the GOD at The Specialists, and I was trained by him so I'm unbeatable too...hehe) who I then asked to slap me in the face. He did and I got her to laugh some more. If all else fails, get her to laugh through pain. It always works.
She also happens to be a huge video game fan like I am. We would always be talking about some random game. She brough in drakkengard (she is a big squareenix fan, just like me!) and we were talking about that. One day we were talking about Final Fantasy X-2. She happened to ask me what boss from FFX did I think was the hardest. Well...I havn't beat FFX yet, and STILL havn't beaten it. (I'm right before Sin, I've been there for like a year...) God i'm a retard. But, to impress her, I acted like I did. So when she asked that question, I responded, "Uhh...well...What do YOU think the hardest boss is?" Smooth huh? She replied Yunaleska, which I had no fuggin clue who that was at the time. So I then replied, "Me too!" (You know that 'ol trick) which got me out of the situation. Now, don't get me wrong, I did know most of the story and I knew the ending of the game, I just hadn't beaten it myself yet. I actaully even have FFX-2, which I got for my birthday last year, and I havn't even played it yet! God i'm pathetic.
Another key point she has is she is a big anime fan. Just like me. We would also talk about anime series and soundtracks and things of that nature. One day we were talking about Cowboy Bebop (Quite possibly the BEST anime series ever!) and I told her that it was my favorite anime series. She agreed. I couldn't believe it. Was this girl too good to be true? The next day I came in with my plushies (Cactuar plush from FFX, A chobobo plush from FFX, and an Ed & Ein plush that I got from suncoast) and we played with those for the period.
Not only did we share that class together, we also had Multimedia class together, but unfourtinatelly we didn't sit next to one another. We sat across from each other. In that class I sat to Zack (quite possibly my best friend) and Jen (another one of my friends, I think she was the girls best friend) so I was never alone to talk to the girl. I mean, with Jen always poking me in the sides and Zack talking to me about stuff, how could I? God damn that class was fun with those two in it. But now I'm getting sidetracked. The only thing worth mentioning about her in that class was I made a picture of her using the MSN face creator thingy that they have online. I made one of her, Zack, Jen, and Myself. They look pretty accurate to what they looked like at the time too.
So this is how it went though out the year. We talked and had fun and stuff like that. Every now and then I would poke her in the arm to get her attention instead of saying her name just because she was so soft. Yeah, i'm kinda a wierdo. Just look at my artwork!
Toward the end of the year, I noticed that the school internet security had been shut down. I told the girl and a bunch of other people and we could go on whatever sites we wanted for like a week straight. One day during that time, I happend to look at what she was looking at. Guess what? She was looking at Deviations from people she watched on Devaintart. I had just started to goto this site like a couple of months before, but hadn't done anything with it. But anyways, what really suprised me was what she was looking at. If I am correct, she was looking at Preggo Furs and Belly Inflation pics(probably some others too, but I'm not going to go and ask her straight out if she likes some of the other inflation types). I couldn't fucking believe it. Not only does she like Music, Video Games, and Anime, but she had the same fetishes as I did. Match. Made. In. Heaven. I couldn't ask for a more perfect girl! Well, right quick my face turned red and I turned away. I don't think she saw me looking at her screen which was a good thing because she would have been embarresed too.
So, the last days of the year roll around. I'm still too much of a chicken shit to ask her out on a date, and Jen happened to tell me she thinks the girl might be a lesibean. Nothing like that to shatter your hopes and dreams and to bring down your self confidence that you were building for a fucking year to ask her out for a date. But anyways, she got her yearbook out and asked me if I wanted to sign it. I flipped it to the back and used an entire page to write a little thingy. I also drew a picture of Tails (Which I wish I had to post up here, it was really good!) and put my deviantART page address on the bottom of the page. At the time , I didn't have up anything except like one thing(The Psyguy model I was working on). I wanted to tell her so bad about what I saw her looking at on the site, but, like I mentioned earlier, I'm a chiken shit when it comes to talking to girls(Well, with things like that). Like a month later, I started to put up the art that is up there now. I was scared as shit that she would actaully go to my site and write on it about my little drawings. I still am now. Just a little.
So, that 's my story. It ends with she is in college now, going for her degree in interior decorating like she wanted. I really hope she becomes one of the best Interior Decorators the world has ever seen. I however, am still in High School, working my ass off to get good grades to impress colleges so I can get into them. I had a chance. I had a chance to be happy in my life and I let it slip by me.
The lesson to be learned here is: Guys, if there is a Girl who you really like but think that she will reject you, it doesn't matter. Just grow a pair and ask her. If you just let her slip by you, I can guarentee you that you will regret it for the rest of your life. I know I have. I gotta give her credit, she is the only girl in my lifetime that has ever made me cry over the fact that I couldn't be with her, that I couldn't see her smile anymore. Hear her laugh. Hear her sweet angelic voice sing some linkin park or evanescence. All because I was too scared that she would say no to me if I asked her out. Too scared to tell her about how I really feel about her. There is this famous quote that goes, "It's better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all." (Or something like that) and it's completely true. I chrish the memorys that I have of the time that we spent together, and I'll never forget them.
Finally, I'm going to say something that I should have said a long time ago, but now it's too late to tell her in person.
I love you Vikki Ashton.
Written By Jason McGowan December 30th, 2004
|
|
Comments