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Dreamer's World
They're people in my dream I play with;
The ones I laugh and chat with,
In the boundless reality of dreams
And the endless potential of eternity;
The world inside my sleep,
Existing in my slumber.
When morning was to come, a dream-friend,
He asked "If you wake up and this dream diminish,
Will we disappear, will we be gone;
From any reality anybody knows?"
I shot no answer, yet perceptive ones
Looked upon us both with horror;
That they should ever disappear when
I wake up from this slumber of long.
And drawing no conclusion from my lips;
They gather around me, they walk towards;
In their eyes were the fires of madness!
"So we see, now we understand;
We'll make sure you're never to awake again."
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Comments
The Mitmit Says:
Very interesting poem:) I really liked the concept a lot!
I just have some suggestions:
They're people in my dream I play with
This sentence confused me.
The world inside my sleep,
Existing in my slumber.
This seems sort of redundant.
I shot no answer, yet perceptive ones
Looked upon us both with horror
There is no clear flow here.
They gather around me, they walk towards;
In their eyes were the fires of madness!
The first line reads like an unfinished sentence. Also, "the fires of madness" seems a bit cliched.