when i look in the mirror

when i look in the mirror

(When I look in the mirror,
I see how tired I am from being here,
So depressed by all my fear,
But yet I do not so much as shed a tear)

Even though She was always there,
As the days go by I find it harder to bear,
That She and I will never again be a pair,
For without her here, life is but a nightmare,

Even so, I know what I should do…,
(Should do…no, no should do about it I Must Continue,)

I know what others will say, that I need to move on, let go,
(Let go, move on, from what I love, from and Know),

I feel that should I truly let go (of what once was) I will lose my balance with in this rock upon which I stand,
Fall in the rushing stream and be lost to the “flow”, (No, I would rather eat a hand full of sand,)

Two sides to all,
And with out balance in foundation they will fall,

<But even worse I see some who deliberately try to straddle between and that makes little logical cense at all,

And when I ask why, they cannot figure to answer some see the flaw and choose to ignore, others simply discard ,
I believe it tis because they do not understand the concept of the flaw, when foundations break, one can be destroyed and if they should survive surly they’d be scared,
However there are those who will see it, stop, listen and think it is they them selves that will begin to find their own rock and someday upon it with confidence they will stand tall,>

(Yes), Yes the way I think maybe harsh,
But it be better then where you are headed, to a corrupted, slime infested, feeds upon on its self stunting it’s own growth of a marsh,

And even though I will never make it there,
Because at that time I do not believe I will breath in air,
But I dream of the day were the air will be calm in the eye of the storm were I can see the moon at its peak ever so fair,
(And with confidence close my eyes and to let go until the next morning of the things I care,

(But no longer does This wash away in the rain),
Of This, of that, of what, of which, of both I feel of pain,

And (now I but struggle to contain),
This feeling that is left with me to forever to remain,

But (in the presents of others) of which ask why I stand so alone,
It dose not it matter I tell them (If only they had known),

[_(For] I cover it not with lies),
However at times I work my way carefully around (to still give but not to give away) tis hard to hide the tears in my eyes,
I say nothing even though time goes on and my life does but dies,
Even as time goes on, (my soul duth but cries,



Though it seems like such a long time ago my vows were written in blood,
For I still remember how we were once on love, for it twas like a blossoming rosebud,

Taking in the first morning rays,
We were open to the world and from others we needed no praise,

For though we were young we had are thorns,
For the people here and now would have said, they were as sharp and poisonous as the devils horns,

Together we were strong…,
Wise, beautiful… and in love) now with out Her everything is but wrong,

Nothing makes sense any more,
(I fear for this race, for so much they are like cancer, but this they ignore,
With their host they stay, grow and thrive and as they are now explore,
Eventually as cancer does it will kill their host and with him dead, they to will fall to the floor

But despite all this, as you and I always did, we woke to find our selves huddled from the cold but watching our breath rise in the morning sun,
And at times, at times I still feel as if we are one…,

But as night comes around I hear no rhythm, no rhyme, for I hear no heart beat,
Just the silence of darkness as I lie here in defeat…),

But without Her, no longer do I cry,
(For without You I have become but angry, secretive, scared and shy,

With You no longer here to hold me and my heart),
I feel I am but beginning to fall apart,

At times between my mind…,
And my emotions they feel as if they are being left behind,

Once so strong was my hope,
Tis no longer held by such a thick rope,

Rather a very thin thread,
By the main symbolism, of number of caps is why, thin but clear, bright of color is not but RED,
(And no longer have I a place to rest my head,
Couse of this to become stronger my heart I filled with lead,

All I have left is the memory of our love,
Me and You, a beautiful little grey dove,

No longer do I have pleasant dreams,
And now I but wake with but screams,

And no longer are Your arms there to greet me to the young rays of another day,
For no longer are Your wings there to surround me in warmth from the cold of a winter breeze and to reassure me it’s all ok,

But there was that once upon a time that whenever I got scared You would calm all my fears),
When ever I cried She would hold me and dry all my tears,

But now (I know) I know not what to do,
Even though She is gone (I still love You,

Now I am but upon my knees,
But screaming and wishing please,

Take my hand,
Lead me out of this place I call not home, This of foreign land,

Take me away from these dark shaded corners,
Take me away from the sight of the true mourners,

Away from all the graves in this field of grey,
Away from the regret of a misunderstood raining day,

When we where able to freely wonder,
In the time no one felt they needed to plunder,

When passion was born,
When all had that of the poisonous thorn,

Into the time when other than each other we needed nothing of material things,
And when all the creatures were immune but could still find the beauty in what the two siren sings,

When we could touch the clouds in the sky,
And when no one needed to be sly,

Take me to when are soles where young,
When the life cycle had just begun,

When beauty thrived,
And when everyone shared the same goals and pride,

Take me back to the time when there was no ruler of the land,
Take me… TAKE ME … to the time when You my love, still held my hand,

I know I must continue,
But I don’t have to let go, just move along with time to the new,

It’s hard (for You are my inspiration to stay alive,
But without you I am but alone, however in the silence and in darkness, tucked away in a corner away from the cosmos and the world, with as I once did that thus I have no longer the fire to thrive,

But no matter how many times we change form no matter weather or not together touch the skies,
I will never forget, for true love never dies)

But I will not roll over and die,
However by my own wings (I’ll be fine) even if by them I’ll never fly,

sirpurplefirefox