Three-Step Program for Narrow-Minded Assholes

Three-Step Program for Narrow-Minded Assholes

So! You've found something on the internet that you can't comprehend? I'm not suprised with how easy it is to effectively brainwash people. The media does it all the time, and people are quick to reinforce opinions that they'll profit from. But that's neither here nor there. You found something you think is sick or wrong or gross or just don't like. Don't worry! I have 3 simple steps for you to follow. By following these three simple steps, you'll be able to go about your business without further disruption of your narrow view of reality. You might even not get banned for being a jackass flamer!

1. GRAB YOUR MOUSE. Make sure to keep your hands as far away from your keyboard as possible. Same with your cursor and any text boxes on the screen, especially the comment one.

2. MOVE THE CURSOR TO ONE OF THE TOP CORNERS. These are your escape route. In all likelyhood, in the upper left corner is a Back button. This makes the scary pikchurz go away. If you're deep into a site full of scary pikchurz, or you're having an especially overwhelming urge to express negative opinions, look in the upper right corner for the emergency exit. It's marked with an X.

3. CLICK. I can't stress this enough. Click until the scary pikchurz go away.

Congratulations! You just avoided being utterly detestable! If you're still tempted to piss people off, clear your history and/or temporary internet files and hit refresh until the scary pikchurz are no longer on the front page.